Of Dreams and Beards

I find myself dreaming about the strangest of things as of late, but my dream self never seemed to be exactly how I look in real life, or at least when I could remember my dreams.

Well, I somehow put a stop to all dream inconsistencies a few nights a go with the help of my glorious facial hair...


Beards are a powerful, powerful thing.

Runaway Imagination

Sometimes I see things that aren't there. 

That sounds crazy, but.... well I guess there's no explanation that doesn't sound crazy, so here's a comic about it.

Un-athletic Fit

 To quote Chris Farley's character, Bennett Brauer, "I'm not 'Svelte'." I am not exactly fat either. By no means am I overweight, but I do have a bit of a pooch that I can't ever seem to get rid of (not that I really try).

So to hide my "girth" or whatever it is, I try to wear darker, looser fitting shirts. Here's what it usually looks like:

So when I buy a new shirt, I tend to overlook whether or not it's normal fit or athletic fit.  And even when I do check, some part of me thinks I'll look good in athletic fit. That part is always wrong and I wish it'd shut up.

I never know whether it's a muffin top, love handles, or a spare tire, but rolls of flab previously thought to be non-existent seem to form when I wear a tighter shirt.

Two Tired

I can't remember the last time I haven't been at least a little tired. I'm so constantly tired, in fact, that I've discovered two distinct subsets of being tired. And before I discover a third and this title doesn't work anymore, let's take a look at the two.

This is my standard "stayed up too late, didn't get enough sleep" tired.  And it is the default state for one such as my self. Most of the time I can't help it as I work well into the night at my job. I am almost constantly in need of more sleep and regularly do not get enough.  On the bright side, I just lost a few pounds from all the stress. Yay stress!

This is when I've been studying for a test that I actually didn't have the next day. This is when I've been up until 5 am working on a rough draft for an essay due tomorrow. This is for when I've absolutely got to procrastinate as long as I possibly can. This - this is truely tired. 

And it's truely unnecessary. But I had to finish the final season of Lost and not write my essay. You don't even know. It was..... magical.

BONUS: During the process of making these two drawings, I accidentally made a hybrid of the two that reminded me of this popular internet image:

Birthday Retrospective: Today and Years Past

I'm fairly certain that 22 is not a milestone. But, for some reason, it feels more like one than any other birthday I've ever had.  Just going by all the stuff I had to do today, you'd think I had a rather crappy birthday, but I assure you, I've had worse. Come, let's take a look.

April 7, 1997

Everything is going well. There's cake, ice cream, 6 or 7 friends from elementary school that end up never talking to me after about middle school, and one more thing. A scavenger hunt.  Pretty neat, huh? WRONG.

It is this particular scavenger hunt in which, I, being the foolish 8 year old that I am, decide to follow my guts on a clue that hints to something involving sound. I immediately think "my brother's stereo" and rush to his room, only to step on and break a model jeep that he was building and had left on the floor.  Nice move, me. Now you have to wait until 6th grade until your brother likes you again.


April 7, 2003

I've been sick for a week. I'm taking some pretty nasty medicine that I've never had to take before or since. This particular medicine does not allow one to consume dairy along side it.  No problem, It's not college so I haven't gotten addicted to cheese yet. I'll live.

OH WAIT. My cake's frosting is dairy. No cake for you, sucker!  And by the time I'm better, the cake is long gone.  That's probably the worst thing in the history of everything. Missing out on  your own birthday cake.


April 7, 2010

I basically freak out and have an existential crisis. 'Nuff said.

Now, on to today.

April 7, 2011

Here's what I thought I'd think the entire day:

I can't believe I have to get up early on my birthday.

I can't believe I have to do manual labor on my birthday.

I can't believe I have to sell my awesome VW Beetle on my birthday.

I can't believe I have to take a test I didn't have time to study for on my birthday.

I can't believe I have a six hour shift with nothing to do on my birthday.

Turns out, I'm actually pretty satisfyed with myself. I got things done today. I feel like I'm actually growing up. In the past, I was carefree and relatively stress-free, yet I've had terrible birthdays. But now I have to pay bills, get cars registered, figure out the rest of my college career and after that, the rest of my life, and somehow I feel more satisfied.

I can't believe that despite all the crap I had to do today, that today was actually a pretty good birthday.

Not as good as that one where I got to go to Discovery Zone though. That place was awesome. I mean, it was DZ! Where kids want to be!

My Exciting Birthday Plans!

I have work all night on my birthday. Woo!

This is pretty much every night at work, except for the hat.  I do have a noise maker, though.

The copy/paste artwork is not just my own laziness this time. It really is that boring at my job.

Nothing interesting is happening to me, so here's a comic about a dream I had.

This was an actual dream. 100% true.

I'm not sure exactly what was going on, but me from the future called me and got me (us?) out of there. I'd like to think if this ever really did happen, I wouldn't be to terrified to tell myself that this is awesome.

Also, if you're confused (and because I'm too lazy to make it clearer within the comic) the lines that start with a dash are from present dream me, and the other lines are from future dream me.